How I Started Adulting My Way!

Hi, I am 20 something Indian, living in Sweden. I have a full-time job, but that doesn’t stop me from trying to write my blog. Like most people, I started this year looking backward and forward. Recapping my 2018, I understood that, sometimes it necessary to take a minute to let things fall into place at their own pace. In order to make this a possibility, I needed to learn to accept, maintain balance and choose where to keep and where to let go of control. I was not making huge mistakes in my life but just doing this, made me realize, that I could be better, that I could have more time for myself.

For someone like me, part of being responsible is being able to balance your state of mind. Not so long ago, my days would just oscillate between work and being tired. I was into random stuff but almost always ended up feeling very unproductive. So, one day I decided that enough was enough and I need to finally start putting my thoughts into words, and start my blog, and I did. It has been a major ride these past months. Not because of my blog entirely, but because it was a journey from not feeling my best emotionally and psychically, to being happy and doing things that make me smile. It began with me choosing to get out of the burnout and recharge cycle, to finally give myself time to reflect.

I took my time in setting up a few things first, I made use of this opportunity to examine what I was consuming, the information from people around me and on social media. I sat down to look at what I was doing and started being brutally honest with myself, I started with tiny steps like carving out time for things I wanted to do, like literally putting time slots for things in my calendar and moved to heavier things like managing money and finding my way around the corner. I began to use the five-minute journal, it has been a super tool for a beginner like me. It is the time in the day or sometimes week where I just sit and reflect on everything happening and take it in and process. Ever since I was a kid, reflecting on things was not something I did a lot, but deep down, I knew that this is how I come up with the next steps for doing something. So, this was finally when I started to embrace 'looking back' not just for the sake of doing it but for actually learning something from it.

Another major change I desperately needed to do at the beginning of this year was to prioritize things other than work. I was using work as an escape to avoid thinking about things that are uncomfortable and avoiding going deep. Again, going back to giving time to myself, to do the things I want to do, to continue the things I need to do, time was key. So that was something I started doing, making room for taking care of myself. Having time. for me specially meant doing things I normally do, but intentionally. Staying offline for a couple of hours a day, helped me. This came naturally to me, I would journal, draw or read, I have always liked to cook, so I would do that and it became simple to make it a lifestyle. I started to care for my skin and this is a big one for me. I am usually a no makeup person, but once in a while now, I turn to the mirror and say to myself, hey, let's do something fun today. It has been a slippery slope there if you know what I mean.

I heard somewhere that you are an adult when you begin to buy your own toilet paper.

Moving on to the other, slightly easier side for most people, managing money. I think I heard somewhere that you are an adult when you begin to buy your own toilet paper. I laughed at the time, but it had some truth to it. When I started living on my own, one of the first things I noticed was that I often tend to ignore checking my bank statements. As a kid, I knew enough to not overspend and to think if I really needed something, but at the same time, I did not have to worry about it in general. Ever since I started earning, I didn't much consider what my options are and what I could do, not until recently anyway. A few days ago, I was looking for an apartment, it didn't really go as I thought it would. I had to seriously consider what was happening with my money. It was then I started to read about how to manage money (okay, might have been just one book). It was good that I did. It helped me learn two essential things. One, it is never too late to evaluate where you are in life. Two, only by investing in yourself, either time or money or both, can you be where you really want to be. This was something I knew before, but it was a good reminder and made me a huge fan of The Financial Diet.

Sometimes life gets overwhelming, things start to happen so rapidly, that is getting hard to have time to process them and these are a few hacks to keep me grounded and sane. Obviously, these just work for me so, feel free to disagree. So, yes, it is your life and there is only your way of dealing with it. I have been doing a lot of these little tweaks in my daily routine these past couples of months and I have learned a few basic things from it. Some of the major ones are, no matter what situation you are in, there are always people who have your back, we just have to find the right tribe. The second most essential lesson I am still learning is that there is no such thing as 'know it all' life is a continuous process of adding skills and inching closer to a better version of yourself. This was, Adulting, my way!