A few weeks ago, my cousin and I had a small falling out. I realized that the root of the issue stems from the fact that she does not realize her value as an individual and she feels lost, alone, and scared. The night that we had our disagreement, I wrote this letter, not just for her, but to any girl that feels the way she does.
This is a letter to all the girls.
This is a letter to the girl who is not sure of her worth.
You are an amazing human being. No matter where you are in life right now or what you have done, the latter statement holds true. All the decisions you have made up until this point were for a reason. Yes, you may have made mistakes, some bigger than others, and you may have regretted them, but those mistakes have transformed you into the incredible person you are today. At this moment, you may feel broken, but in my eyes, you are unbreakable. Each hardship you have encountered has molded and shaped you into a resilient human being. Life is not always easy, you know this to be true, more so than others, but the universe throws the worst situations at the best people—because they can handle it. You can handle this and you will get through this.
You are a powerful entity. Once you decide to risk it all and step away from whatever, or whoever is holding you back, this letter will always be here for you. These words are a reminder that everything will be okay. You will not always feel alone, or empty, or sad. A year from now, you will read this letter and you will remember the pain you felt and how you thrived from the adversity. In time, the old you will feel so distant and foreign that it’ll be hard to even grasp the idea of the girl you used to be.
This is a letter to the girl who is scared to be alone.
Remember that you are here today because of a woman. Your mother gave life to you, and regardless of the quality of your relationship with her, she is the reason you are alive today. The very fact that women can bear life means that you are born with a powerful gift. Women have a natural ability to empower and love others in a way that a man cannot. Instead of leaning on a man for comfort, why not lean on the women that have gone through the same experiences as you and have grown from their struggles?
You may be in a relationship right now, with a guy who does not recognize the fire and potential inside you that I do. Just know that you are worth more than broken record sounds of “You’re beautiful” and cheap “I love you[s]”. You are worthy of someone who will not dull your shine and who will not build you up just to tear you down; someone who will never make you feel like you will be lonely and helpless without him. Real love does not harbor hatred or jealousy or insecurity or fear. Love is not forced nor is it questioned. So if you are unsure if what you have right now is love . . . you already have your answer.
Trust me, take the time to be sad and alone. There is a difference between “alone” and “lonely”, and there is nothing wrong with sadness. It’s an emotion we feel so we can have something in comparison to happiness—without sadness, happiness would have no meaning. Sadness in solitude is a time that you will learn more about yourself than you, or anyone else, has ever known. You will learn which people truly deserve to have a place in your life and it will be easier to spot authenticity in a sea of artificial love. You cannot accept love until you learn to love yourself, so take the time to learn how to do so. You will learn to give yourself the best kind of love and will realize that if someone cannot reciprocate the same, that person is not worthy of your time or of your heart.
This is a letter to the girl that needs a reminder.
I know you may not have heard these words often throughout your life, but you are loved. You are loved by me and I appreciate you for all that you are. I see how hard it is for you to get out of bed each day and to show up to class or work and put a smile on your face, when you are really falling apart at the seams. This letter is my recognition of all the hard work you have put into your life thus far. Every action you do and every word you say has a purpose and you possess the ability to achieve greatness. I have faith in all that you are in this moment, and the person you are slowly becoming. I don’t worry about you, but not because I don’t care. I don’t worry because I know you will soon step into the person you were born to be. When you are ready, I will be waiting, and these words will be a reminder of how far you have come.
This is a letter to all the girls.